Conquering Clutter When You Have ADHD
They Go Together Like Peanut Butter and Jelly
Introduction: The Rise of the Consumerism and Clutter
I started working as an organizer before there was such a thing as professional organizers. I didn’t know it at the time, but as I was developing my organizing and decluttering chops, there was a whole new industry unfolding in response to the growing consumerism of the 1980s.
A strong economy and the rise of dual-income households meant more purchasing power. More income, more stuff. More stuff, bigger homes.
And more stuff begets less time to deal with it.
In 1983, the National Association of Professional Organizers (NAPO) codified standards and helped turn organizing into a profession.
The rest, as they say, is history. From Marie Kondo books to television shows like Hoarders and Clean Sweep have given the profession more visibility. Additionally, it has increased the credibility of this important work when you see how transformative it can be.
I am grateful for all the groundbreaking work by those in the industry. While organizing principles might be the same, each organizer brings their own special blend of creativity and wisdom for their clients or audience. This is especially important because there is no such thing as a one-size-fits-all approach to decluttering and organizing.
Marie Kondo’s KonMari method may work well for one person, while others find success following the Home Edit approach. Peter Walsh connects outer clutter to inner emotional clutter. While the Minimalist believe that you just need to throw out everything. (Just kidding! I adore Joshua Fields Millburn and Ryan Nicodemus.)
But what about if you have ADHD? I’m so glad you asked.
While most people can grab some tidbits and takeaways from any approach, I believe we ADHD’ers need a different modality because we have unique challenges.
The Unique Challenges of Organizing For ADHD’ers
Since my diagnosis of ADHD just a few short years ago, my eyes have been opened to just challenging life can be compared to someone undistracted by a thousand squirrels swinging on trapezes in their skull.
I understand now that the level of overwhelm I’ve lived with most of my life isn’t because I’m a super-charged person. No, it’s because super-charge comes as a standard side dish with every entrée of ADHD. And it is absolutely exhausting on most days. (I used to joke I felt like a Ferrari engine inside a VW Bug.) And while employers love “high energy” people because they can get so much done, the ADHD’ers pay a premium price for it. (Medication has been an enormous help for me and I marvel at how I’ve lived all my life without it.)
The constellation of challenges can be daunting!
While I don’t struggle with time blindness or clutter, I believe this is only because I developed strategies from a young age. Intuitively, I knew I needed a peaceful outer environment to keep from being overwhelmed by the mental squirrel gymnastics.
Can you relate to any of the following challenges?
Time Blindness-This is the difficulty in perceiving time accurately, which in turns makes it hard to prioritize tasks according to the time commitment needed. Because of this, even the simplest of organizing tasks gets postponed.
It goes with both overestimating and underestimating time. Because of this, I encourage people to use a timer to give sight to the (time) blind. You may not feel you have time to do a quick tidy in the bathroom after your shower, but after using the timer, you understand it literally takes seconds to hang up your towel and wipe off the counter.
At the other end of the spectrum is the tendency to overestimate time required to, say, clean out the garage. Then it doesn’t happen because you may think you’re looking at 40 hours of labor when, in reality, it will take half that amount. (Pssst, this is where a professional organizer can give you a more accurate estimation.) Again, a timer can be very helpful. By learning to break big projects into daily 10-15 minutes/day task, you discover you can indeed move (clutter) mountains.
Difficulty Getting Going and Then Stopping-Most everyone jokes about procrastination but for us ADHD’ers, the struggle is no laughing matter when the consequences bite you in the ass. (Like getting a shut-off notice because you kept putting off paying the power bill.)
The good news? Once we engage in a project, GET OUT OF THE WAY! Because when we tap into this superpower, we git shit done. Buuuuut, it also means we may lose track of time and dammit, (here’s the time blindness again,) you spaced off the appointment you scheduled 4 months ago.
Executive Function Deficits-The overwhelm can stem from here. While ADHD’ers are often smarter than the average bear, the struggle to plan, prioritize, and make decisions, means that squirrel troupe can hijack the best of your plans.
And here is why it’s critical to break organizing tasks into bite-sized pieces. Celebrate those moments when you meet a small goal! The positive reinforcement will only strengthen your intentions and you can then build on the smallest of successes. Nothing builds success like success!
High Sensitivity Clutter- When I walk into a client’s home, I can tell within a moment if they have ADHD, as reflected in their cluttered and chaotic home. My heart will swell with compassion. I think there is a trope that ADHD’ers function well in clutter. Think: Absent-minded professor with papers strewn all over his offer and says the clutter helps him think. Um. If that is true, I think it is a rare exception.
More often, the clients are overwhelmed and feel shame because they just can’t seem to get ahead of the messes and STAY ahead of them. So, the cycle continues. More clutter begats more stress and shame, rinse, later, repeat.
By the way, of all the clients I’ve worked with through the years, it is my ADHD clients that inspire me the most.
Out-of-Sight, Out-of-Mind- It’s easy to just throw shit behind a cupboard door or closet when you hit the tipping point of your clutter tolerance. Or perhaps a friend pulling up into your driveway triggers a frenetic dash and hide. Then we forget about it. And similar to the one law of science that says gas will fill the shape of its container, so it is with clutter. Once clutter gains a foothold there, it will eventually fill the shape of that space.
Unless it is a designated place behind a door or drawer, this will only worsen the clutter.
Impulsivity- How often have you set out to do one thing but on your way to do that one thing, you end up detouring into many other tasks? On your way to throw a load of clothes in the washes, you see paperwork you need to finish for your upcoming appointment. I’d better do it now or I will forget it. From there, you realize you may have not put that appointment on your calendar, so now you’re scrolling through your calendar app. Which reminds me, I need to put peanut butter on the shopping list. Hmmmm. I wonder if there are other items I overlooked as well. Hello, pantry. Good bye two hours.
When I get into that mode, I transform into a human Roomba, powered by lightning-fast impulsivity. I’m busy, sure. But the interrupting nature of the impulsivity will keep me from completing the task. At least the real Roomba will complete its task.
And not only have I failed to get the laundry finished, all the negative self-talk swing into high gear. What’s the matter with you? Why can’t you finish your shit like normal people? Foooooooocus, FFS!
Conclusion- “Good Enough” Wins the Day
Have fun exploring what organizing approaches work for you. And use copious amounts of self-compassion to nip the negative self-talk in the bud. A sense of humor is always good too!
But I think the biggest thing is to remember that “good enough” is GOOD ENOUGH. Striving for perfection and setting unrealistic expectations usually brings only self-condemnation. Discover what works best for you. This includes giving your self-permission to maintain a certain level of clutter before it becomes a source of stress.
What’s good enough for you is all that matters. Happy Decluttering!
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